At nearly 405 pounds and 37 years old, I was convinced my doctor was going to give up on me and tell me to go home and die. I was a single dad, struggling through a divorce, had battled obesity my entire life, and was now my highest weight ever. I was getting winded walking with my daughter through the grocery store. My back started to hurt when I tried to clean myself after using the bathroom. It was horrid. I was on three hypertension medications, two antidepressants, a supplement, and a crash course with an early grave. I’d tried everything you can think of over the years and had moderate successes. Hell, I’d even walked a few half-marathons! I’d lost up to 80 pounds in a go. Weight lifting. Weight watchers. Brown rice. Atkins. 30/10. You name it. I tried it. It worked. A little. And then didn’t – a lot. I was also struggling with some huge emotional triggers and issues that had come along with the divorce, losing a job, losing a parent, and more.
Stepping on that scale and seeing 400+ pounds for the first time in my life scared me senseless. I was terrified and resolved to do whatever my doctor and counselor told me to do. If they hadn’t already given up on me. Lord knows, I sure as hell had.
When I finally came to the decision to make the call and the consult and knew I was going to have surgery – I started finally feeling curious and hopeful. Not to mention TERRIFIED. I’d never had surgery before and was frightened of the whole process. The team at Eviva, and Dr. Landerholm specifically, put me at ease immediately and comforted me into letting my extroverted competitive side come out.
That consultation changed my entire life. I sat with Dr. L and listened to him tell me how the procedure worked. He was filled with such confidence and such caring. I work as a professional (attorney) dealing with client care, and I could immediately tell he was sincere. More than that, he wasn’t stuffy or jargon-y. He just talked to me. Like a friend would. We joked around a little even. When he asked me what my goal was, I decided to shoot for the moon. I told him I wanted to be on the cover of their success story binder.
Surgery day was nerve-racking because despite doing a ton of research, I was still scared. The staff, the anesthesiologist, and Dr. L (of course) put me at ease once again. My surgery went off without a hitch, and I was home within 12 hours and resting. I was on my feet nearly immediately walking and starting the recovery. The aftercare program was a huge part of how and why I chose Eviva. Their staff, both medical and surgical, as well as the Facebook group and support meetings have really helped keep me accountable and helped me meet lifelong friends and companions on this journey. Even my soulmate, if you can believe that!
When I first called Eviva I was 405 pounds – and today I’m 240.4. I’ve gone from a 4xl to a Large in most things and a Medium in a few others. I’d still like to get to 220 and am working on it. I’m off almost all medication and am feeling great. I’ve completed several running challenges (doing 10ks and Half Marathons on successive days) and written a book about my experience through this process called #SleeveLife: Losing Half of Myself and Finding the Rest. What excites me now is just the range of things I can do and consider doing – like buying off the rack – or going indoor skydiving – or fitting comfortably on theme park rides. So much “normal” stuff that people take for granted.
It is NOT a cop out to have surgery. It’s not easy and it’s not for wimps. It’s a tool and if you treat it right it can and will drive you towards success. I know you can do it because if I can – anyone can.
